When it's nice outside and everyone is happy, I get very sad?

I'm a nice person I try to be a happy one also but I find it really hard. I'm 250 pounds, 5'8", and 17. I know I'm not the most popular kid out there but I'm always sad. I try to be happy but It just doesn't happen. Ever since I can remember I've been depressed. I don't like to say this because I haven't been to the doctor. So technically I don't know it yet. Today is a really nice day here in Chicago. My sister and brother are out and about and they have invited me but I just feel... IDK? really sad I want to cry for no particular reason. I have very few friends and I hang out of my house like maybe once a month I usually never leave home I have very low self esteem I really hate being sad. I have noticed that all the windows in my room are covered with a second black fabric. I hate the sunlight in my house. I don't know why. I love my privacy. People usually bother me. Does anyone know what might be going on in my life? has anyone ever experienced this? My friends call me like twice a week to see if I want to go out but I just can't I feel so bad in public. I like to think I'm smart I spend most of the time reading but I really wish I were a happy kid.


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Fernando.|||You sound a little depressed. I think you should see a doctor to maybe diagnose your problem and help you. Sometimes it's just hard and you feel this pressure to be happy because people around you are, and it makes you even unhappier. We all have our down days, but if this is ongoing for you, professional help might be the best solution. Feeling sad all the time is something you shouldn't have to live with. I hope you get better very soon:)|||Hey, I spent dozens of years feeling that way...





the best thing I can tell you is go and investigate a guy named Jesus. Keep an open mind. I found him after dozens of years of being miserable. Don't wait as long as I did. Wish I had found him when I was young...|||I don't have any advice, but I just wanted to say I know how you feel, I feel just like that a lot of the time.|||lose weight


make new friends


get a life (i mean it in a nice way)|||jesus christ get some help buddy