Help Caregiving help ?

Ok so i jus moved to florida from chicago left evrything job friends everything for my grandmother. Shes 80 yrs old . When i got here she wasnt walking very well n needed some help around the house because my aunt passed away and was taking care of her.anyway its gotten bad in the past 5 months my grandmother completely stopped doing everything .. She cant walk at all anymore i bought her a portable wheelchair jus for the times we go out in public shopping and stuff. Well now she wont walk and relys on the chair and also she stopped getting dressed her self and goin to the bathroom herself. I did not kno i would have to do all this its very hard. I was wandering if someone can help me with a scedule because i have no set routine and dnt kno wat to do.i also feel horrable cuz when she has bathroom accidents i lose my temper and get very angry and yell at her i kno she cant help it and i feel so bad.|||I admire your courage to do this for her.


What I strongly recommend that you do is call her doctor to let him or her know what is going on. It isn't normal for your grandmother to lose all these skills and get so weak in this short period of time.


She might have an infection, or have developed dementia.


Quite honestly, she might benefit from a short stay in a rehab facility to regain some of these skills. A physical therapist can help her learn how to walk again, and an occupational therapist can help her learn how to get on and off the toilet and how to feed and dress herself again.


There are options, and she deserves to have the best chance.|||Wow, can I sympathize with you! I have been taking care of my 90 yr old mom and my 70 yr old mentally handicapped sister who has stage 4 breast cancer! You don't mention your age, (I'm 50) and it might make a difference in my answer, but I'll try not to let it. Yes, you really need to get a routine going, so she'll always know what to expect and when. I've been taking care of them for almost 2 years now, along with my husband, who I couldn't even have CONSIDERED doing this for any length of time w/o him! I have several health issues myself, and add going through menopause at the same time..well, let me just say that it's a miracle (or a testament to him) that one of us (him) isn't buried in the backyard next to the telemarketer who kept calling me 'sir' on the phone....And I certainly understand about the frustration that drives your anger. My mom and I were never that close to begin with, but I'm the youngest of 7 and no one else will even call her, much less take care of her. For the record, it's easier for all parties involved if there is a schedule to go by. She could probably benefit from some adult diapers, but here's the thing, and it's a very difficult thing once you get ensconced into a routine to realize that those subtle changes have suddenly built up into a huge one: YOU HAVE TO KNOW WHEN IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO GET HER PROFESSIONAL HELP.You have to be on your toes and keep records of her behavior, illnesses, etc. And if it starts looking like she needs round-the-clock availability of nursing care, it will be time to place her somewhere and it would be in HER best interests. Hope this helped, and blessed be, you are good person to take on such a fine and noble deed! As far as giving you an actual schedule, all I can do is give you mine, and maybe it will help you as an outline, okay? Breakfast: from 8 to 9 a.m. and generally just flavored instant oatmeal. She can have a snack before lunch of peanut butter crackers. Lunch; usually a bowl of soup and a sandwich. Another snack in the afternoon before dinner. Dinner is the biggest meal for us, usually at about 6 p.m, consisting of a balanced meal. Your Grandma is probably depressed honey, so take her for a check up to her primary care physician, and have him give you a referral to a reputable psychiatrist. Also, the correct amount of medication can make her want to try to do things for herself.